Cosmic Retribution

BY SOPHIE CHUNG

Oh my Godddd I totally forgot that I had the world's weirdest flatmate who had no sense of what was appropriate to say.

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20 DEC - 2016

She used to linger by the stairs, head over banister, watching us and contributing at random points with sexually charged comments.

She always hit on my friends when they were over in an exceedingly uncomfortable way. We were always as nice as we could possibly be in response, but most of the time she left us rather speechless and very confused. The last few months of her stay was pretty horrible for me and it turned out that she was a pretty horrid person saying even more horrid things.
Excerpt from August 10th, 2015:
"My batshit crazy ass flatmate is moving out – THANK YOU God and Buddha.
She just tried to sell us a sofa chair that she picked up off the the street on inorganic day for $150… was probably infested with all sorts of disease-ridden mites.
We politely declined.
She posted this chair to sell on Trademe but accidentally put the “buy now” price for $1 and successfully sold it…. for $1.
Just a mildly entertaining form of cosmic retribution right here. Cheers universe!"
*Justice was righteously served. After all, she lugged a sofa chair to our apartment building and then upstairs to the living area. That moving service itself would've been worth more than a mere dollar.

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